Baby Showers

I have lucked out with some of the best friends and family ever! 

We had a couple baby showers which were so great and I just couldn't believe how generous everyone was! 

Quenalee threw Tylee and I a joint shower and it was fun! It was mostly family with a few friends who stopped in. We took turns opening gifts and came away with some fun stuff! I was so happy and grateful for how it turned out!

My friends also threw me a little baby shower. We met at a little deli restaurant in Idaho Falls and had a party! We had some great food and I opened some awesome gifts so it really just doesn't get better than that. This babe is so lucky to have so many people who love her already, and I have been feeling pretty blessed myself! 

Non-Important Bits

1. The flies are stiiicky right now and I hate it. They swarm around the doors so every time I open them for a even a second I get a deluge of flies pouring in. And then, they don't really want to stay in so they just sit and buzz around the windows until they die in the sills. It's just not my favorite thing right now. Another thing that is not my favorite right now is all the smoke in the air. We can't see the hills, let alone the mountains behind our house. It is just so dreary and weird and makes everything feel closed in and claustrophobic. 

2. I've got a nasty cold that's dragging me down. Maybe (probably) I'm just a wanny, but my colds are the worst. I get the aches and chills and a fuzzy head and basically I've been out for the count for a few days. Maybe I'm just milking it extra because it will likely (hopefully) be my last sick day without anyone else to take care of. (Kolton doesn't count. He's pretty self sufficient) Although this morning I did drag myself from my hazy medicine ridden fog to peel another peach for Kolton's breakfast (I'm wondering if he will be sick of peaches soon. He's honestly eaten one for two out of three meals every day this week). I was halfway through peeling when he mentioned that maybe I ought to put the cut peels somewhere other than in the bowl with the peach he'd already peeled for himself. I thought that maybe he'd made a good point there. 

Also, the other night I took some nighttime Tylenol cold stuff. With the nighttime medicine I either sleep amazing or not at all, and I can't figure out what makes the difference. Anyway, this particular night was one of the horrid ones. I don't know if this happens to anyone else but sometimes when I take those meds it just makes my head buzz. I just go over and over the same stupid thought process in my head and I can't make it turn off. I'll lay there for an hour thinking about the same dumb thing that doesn't matter. And I KNOW it doesn't matter but my brain will just not quit harping on it. It's odd. Maybe I'm the only one. I don't know. Anyway this night was really, really bad and just as I would turn my brain off and start getting some sleep I would have to visit the bathroom and then start the whole process over. But on one of my ten trips to the bathroom that night I noticed that Kolton was no longer in bed and was sleeping on the couch. The next morning I asked him about it and without saying a word he gets on his phone and starts watching a video of a motocross race. I asked him again and he turns his phone toward me and I see that it is no motocross race on the screen, but instead a sound recording of me snoring. And I'll tell you what, it was LOUD. I did not know sounds like that could come from me, but it's this cold I'm telling you! I think I've made the point that I'm not loving being sick. 

3. The other day I was mowing the lawn and ran out of gas. And then I realized that our gas tank was also out of gas. So Kolton called to get it refilled but it has yet to happen. So our lawn is half mowed and has just looked really cute and trashy for the last three days. So that's been fun.

4. I'm getting large as a barge. Actually, that's not true. I still feel pretty little and somewhat cute most days. Occasionally I'll get a side view and have to avert my eyes but honestly I am feeling really good. Really good. I feel almost guilty for how great I feel right now with 6 weeks left (say whaaat!). And you know what else? My morale is pretty high too. Some days it's a battle between being called names like "Prego" (courtesy of Kolton. Not THE prego, just Prego. I'll use it in a sentence: "Hey Prego, will you peel me my fourteenth peach of the day?") and my favorite by far, "Prega-Mega". (Brevan is the genius behind that one which Kolton has also adopted.) So even though there are those who try to bring me down, I've managed to keep my spirits up. And Baby Girl has been moving like crazy lately! I feel her all the time not necessarily kicking but just squirming and trying to find some room. 

Speaking of room, I'm in a state of panic over baby's room right now as a result of the fact that I can barely wedge the door open because there's so much junk in there. Here's the rundown: all my shower gifts, tupperwares of clothes, a crib (still in the box), a crib mattress, a carseat, an ironing board, a drying rack, a desk, a rocker recliner, oh! and a piano. So that is just fabulous and really causing my blood pressure to rise. Hopefully one day very soon Kolton will slow down at work for half a second and we can work on organizing and hauling everything out. But until then I've got a little knot creeping up my esophagus that has nothing to do with heartburn because...6 weeks people! She's basically here and this shiz is getting real.

However, you will be interested to know that every day I get more excited and less nervous. So that's been fun/comforting. I think she's gonna be pretty cool. 

5. I heard some great news the other day! School started 2 days ago and I can't even express to you how happy/elated/jumping for joy etc. I am to not be down there. Doesn't that sound awful? I loved my job, really. It was a blast and I think I was somewhat not terrible at it. But this right now just feels so right and good and I am just totally great with being done with that part of life for right now. Kolton informed me that he was pretty happy about it too because now he doesn't have to hear all the mundane details of every second of the day along with my observations about each of those seconds of the day. Okay, but that's not the great news. The great news is that one of my teacher friends told me they got the ISAT scores back from last spring and that my 5th graders had scored above the state average in Language Arts. I was pretty darn pleased about that. While I definitely don't believe standardized testing is the end-all-be-all, it's great to hear that the kids were prepared and able to do something that was really scary for them (and me). So I'm going to live on that news for a while. 

I think maybe 5 numbered points is a tiny bit excessive, so I'll stop there. I just had a lot of non-important things to share! 

Oh yeah, one more thing...

This (they tell me) is a photo of my unborn child. I'm not entirely convinced that it's not a stock photo but that gigantaur nose does look a little familiar.  It's been blowing my mind all week and we've been pretty excited about it. 

Tylee and Tyrel

They did it! They finally got married! Not that we've been waiting for forever or anything, but it's all very exciting either way. And I am actually having flashbacks to when Tylee was on her mission and I was giving my mom a pep talk because she was just sure that Tyrel had a girlfriend. So maybe it is a pretty big deal. 

It was a great day and we are super excited to have Tyrel in the family. Those two just go together and it's fun to have another married couple to pal around with. Also, I'm just really excited for them because marriage is the best thing I have ever done and I get excited when other people get to experience it. 

The sealing was so nice and the reception was beautiful. We had some great weather and just really lucked out. I only got this one picture from the day, but I just really love it so here it is: 

Happy day!

Quit Crapping Your Pants!!!

So a while ago we went with my family to the Ramp Riot which was a big Motocross and BMX show. They had gotten free tickets from a fertilizer guy (or something of the like) and not to miss out on any parties, especially free ones, we were all over it. 

We ate dinner at Texas Roadhouse which was a real shame because that was during the part of this pregnancy where eating meat made me sick. So I stuck with rolls and mashed potatoes and salad. I do not know why anyone would willingly put themselves through the torture that is vegetarianism. 

Then we went to the Mini-Dome to watch the show. They had huge jumps set up and were pulling out some pretty big tricks. We were enjoying the show and definitely enjoying our Mini-Dome ice cream (because really, why else would you go to the Mini-Dome if not to get some of their ice cream?) when the evening took a turn for the worse. 

The guy sitting in front of us with his family must have had one heck of a sick stomach and wanted everyone around him to know it. Kolton had the good luck to be sitting right behind him and oh my heck. Stinkiest worst thing ever. And they just kept coming. Kolton was getting rather disgusted and then flew right by disgusted and became absolutely livid. At one point during the show he yelled, "Quit crapping your pants!!!!" and then I died laughing. And then when Tylee and Tyrel heard they died laughing too. And when we finally got out of that show and back with my family and told them about it they couldn't quit laughing either. All the way home. I'm pretty sure their esteem of Kolton rose about 10 points that day. So I guess it was worth it! 

School Wrap-Up

The last few weeks of school were some busy ones! It seems like so long ago now, I hope I can remember! 

We had teacher appreciation week which is always my favorite! But unfortunately I caught the flu and stayed home during two of the days that week so I didn't feel as much appreciation as I wish I had! The PTO brought in treats every day of the week and of course the one week we have treats I had to miss out. And staying home from school really isn't all that fun. I just sit and stew about what is going on and hope everything is going according to plan and that the kids are being good. So it was nice to go back later that week. 

We also took a little field trip that I thought was super fun. We went to the Craze and played laser tag, mini golf, and arcade games and then took a tour of BYU-Idaho. We went to the planetarium and watched a movie about under the sea dinosaurs which the kids loved and then went to the Geology Museum, the Food Services, and the Wildlife Museum. It was a good time! 

The last week of school was nuts of course. Monday was Memorial Day and then Tuesday was the day of our Research Project Presentations. The kids worked so hard on their projects and it was fun to watch them present! They wrote two page typed essay about their topic (someone from American History), made a poster, found a costume, and wrote and memorized a one minute speech to present. They all did so great and I just loved that project. 

That week we also had Field Day which was super fun and then it was the last day! Those kids worked their fannies off for me! They were great. I had to clean out the room (both my stuff and whatever else was in there) for the new teacher and was feeling overwhelmed at the task. But when I saw that I had 21 kids with nothing to do all day I decided to take advantage of it. And I worked them hard. Everybody had jobs and I didn't do any work at all! I just bossed kids around all day which is something I'm really good at. I had some kids help me dejunk shelves and drawers and got a kick out of their expressions when I handed them huge stacks of paper and told them to throw it away. We went through many trash bags that day but by the end of the day the room was all cleaned out. The kids were so great and helpful and I don't know how I could have done it without them. Then we went to the gym for the last hour of the day and had a little dance and then turned them loose for summer! It was definitely a bittersweet day. I am totally okay with being done teaching but I will miss hanging out with those kids every day. They were such great kids and just so fun. I definitely learned a lot from those two years of teaching and I wouldn't trade those experiences for anything. But I am also ready to have just one kid to take care of and make sure she is behaving. But I will miss it!

The Fourth

Over the Fourth of July weekend we were super busy! We had 2 family reunions to hit so basically our weekend consisted of a lot of driving. But we still had a nice time. The first reunion was the Mickelsen reunion in Island Park. On Thursday I had to go to Girl's Camp for dinner and testimony meeting so I talked Kolton into coming with me and we could just leave straight from camp. He finally agreed, so that's what we did. I don't think he was too impressed with Girl's Camp. It wasn't rugged enough for him and there was a lot of singing. But I sure had a nice time! From there we grabbed Addi and had her ride with us to Island Park. It was quite a drive late at night and we were all a little sleepy so to keep us awake we started making up a poem, each taking a turn to write a line. Kolton was hesitant at first, but once he started he really got on a roll and made up basically the entire last half of the poem by himself. We thought we were quite funny.

One summer night we hit the road 

By the light the full moon bestowed,

Headed to celebrate the day

Now that we're all done with hay,

With my wife beside me nagging all the way

I will listen carefully to what she has to say (because it's so important),

We saw many cops along our route 

We are not sure what they are all about,

Time soon told why they were out

I'm sure when he handed them the ticket they began to pout, 

On we headed through the night 

Our eyelids putting up quite a fight, 

But not our trusty pilot he is steady and sure 

Try writing poetry that's the cure, 

Our poor prego has lost control

We were soon on bathroom patrol,

With all other stores out of site

Last Chance looked to be right,

11:06 time ticking away 

We were anxious about our day of play,

Addi stinks she hasn't showered 

She's getting smellier by the hour, 

The top of the summit we are getting near 

To our destination we are close my dear,

On and on we think and drive

What next line can we derive,

It's getting late our minds are mush

Addi has lost interest in this stuff,

And so our poetry must come to an end

As Brevan would say "That's the end my friend."

The next day we got out on the water and did some wakeboarding. There were only a few tears as we tried to convince the kids to get out there. When we had had a gut full we headed back to the cabin, ate lunch, and then I settled in with my book for the rest of the afternoon. Kolton took a boatload (literally!) of people out again and they were gone for a couple hours. Meanwhile I read and read and applied sunscreen and ate Otter Pops. It was fabulous. 

That night we ate dinner and had s'mores and went to bed. The next morning Kolton and I jetted out while the rest of the family ran the little Island Park race. We had many miles to travel and were headed to Malad for the Hansen reunion. 

We got to the campground around noon and visited for a little bit. Then I was starving so Kolton, Tyson, and I went into Malad to grab some lunch. Then we came back and visited some more and played a few rounds of cards. Later that night we had a little program where we played Jeopardy and answered questions about the original Hansen family. Our team won no thanks to us (although we did know a couple of the answers). 

Then before the fireworks started we decided to take a little ride up to see the spring. And it was beautiful up there! You wouldn't believe that all that beauty is just a few miles from the freeway. 

Then we drove to Malad and watched the fireworks which were a pretty decent show! I know Kolton wasn't dying on going to the fireworks, but I just love them too much and he is a sport. Luckily Kirt and Sandra had reserved some rooms at a little Bed and Breakfast near the campground. And it was the cutest little b&b I've ever seen! It was also great to be in an actual bed and not a tent. Especially because we woke up the next morning to rain, rain, rain. All that rain continued through breakfast and the little Sunday service and only let up as we were heading out. 

And that was our weekend! It was a good one filled with family and good food and fireworks. Cant' get much better than that!

Test-Run

So a while ago we had our first little test-run as parents. We have been parents to Brevan and Addi before but it's not really the same. There's nothing we can do to fix them at this point. Oh, and they are kind of old and can take care of themselves basically. 

So when Shannon asked us to watch Emme for the weekend we were a tiny bit nervous but also excited. It got even better when Calvin decided that he wanted to stay with us too. The first little bit Emme was upset but she calmed down and was great the rest of the time! That night we played and ate dinner and hung out. It was pretty low key and a good night! That Calvin is quite the talker and about everything he says is hilarious. I learned a lot about baby hopping cows throughout the whole weekend among other things. When I got Emme to go to sleep I laid her in the pack n' play in the spare bedroom. I was nervous about Calvin getting to sleep because I worried that he would get scared. But he was great! 

We turned on Magic School Bus on Netflix which took both of us back to our childhoods and to my surprise Calvin loved it! We had set him up a little bed on the couch with the John Deere blanket. We figured he would fall asleep during the show but after three episodes he was still going strong! Kolton on the other hand had falled asleep on the floor. I was doing everything I could not to upset Calvin because I worried that it would be a slippery slope but when he asked for a fourth show I had to say no. And he was just fine. I ran him to the bathroom and then laid down next to him on the couch while he fell asleep. It was 10 by then and he was a little worried about the tiny bit of light coming through the slits of the closed blinds. So I closed them the other way and then tried really hard not to laugh when he asked me to push the button on his pillow pet that he was using as a pillow to make it light up. It didn't take too long for him to drift off and then I had to rouse Kolton to come to bed. Man, putting three kids to bed can be a lot of work! 

Emme slept til about two and then woke up and was very upset so I had the brilliant idea to bring her into bed with us. It was quite the night from that point on. She slept pretty good but would wake up and whimper about every hour or so. All it took to get her back to sleep was a little "shhh..." and pat on the back. So it could have been a lot worse. But there definitely was not enough room for the three of us in our little bed, especially with a squirmy baby who was kind of all over the place. She pretty much took up the middle while Kolton and I clung to the edges. 

The next morning we had breakfast and then Kolton took Calvin to work and Emme and I hung around the house. It was pretty rainy and wet outside so Kolton rigged up some rain boots for Calvin by putting bread bags and rubber bands over his shoes. I died laughing but also recognized the brilliance of the idea. While the boys were gone Emme and I cleaned up (turns out syrup and kids is not the greatest idea) played and then cuddled up on the couch and took a little nap. 

After our nap I fixed us a little lunch. While we were eating I kept hearing a wailing sound. I could only hear it every so often because I had the fan going but I couldn't figure out what it was. I thought it was probably Calvin but when he and Kolton never came in the house I didn't know what to think. Finally I checked outside and of course, there was Calvin and he was soooo sad. I felt awful! He had to go potty so Kolton dropped him off (I have no idea why he didn't bring him inside or at least TELL me that he had left him.) and he had come to our front door which no one ever uses and couldn't get it open. He had had an accident since he had been sitting outside for forever and I just felt so so so so bad. So I brought him inside and put him in the bath and basically asked what I could get him to make up for our parenting fail and make him happy. He requested 5 M&Ms. I can do that! By the time he got out of the bath he was happy again. 

But from that point on our relaxing afternoon turned a little hectic. After Calvin got out, I stuck Emme in the bath because she had ended up with peanut butter in her hair. Then I made Calvin lunch and Kolton lunch and because we were trying to go on a date that night I was trying to get ready and clean up and pack up the kids and it was a lot of work! 

But we got it all done and really did have a good time! And because we kept our heads above water we decided that maybe we can handle one baby. Maybe. 

Beehive Trip

We again got crazy and took our Beehives up to Island Park for the weekend. This time they had to read the Book of Mormon in 4 months. It took a few of them a little longer, but since our trip got delayed so many times, they were all able to finish before we went. We left after school and headed up after a brief stop at Broulim’s.

On the way we got in a huge traffic jam. There had been a wreck and traffic was way backed up while they brought in Life Flight. When we realized we would be there awhile we turned off the pickup. And sure enough our little Duke friend ( who I know I didn’t invite on this little venture) jumped out. He was exploring a little and ran up a few cars. We watched while a little family got out and pet him and loved on him. Then pretty soon they pulled out some food and he was munching away. I don’t know what made him do it, but after he had eaten a little he hightailed it out of there and jumped inside the pickup through one of the open doors(which honestly, he NEVER does). I was just trying to shoo him out when that lady from the car ahead of us came running up. “I am so sorry about that!” she said as she tried to get him to come out of the pickup. It was at this point I realized that lady was trying to dog-nap Duke right in front of our eyes. “Um, he’s our dog…” I started to explain. “Oh!” she said with this shocked look on her face. “He’s just kind of skinny and we pick up dogs all the time! We’ve got like 6 right now that we have picked up from different places.” I didn’t have the heart to tell her that maybe she should check out some “Lost Dog” signs and maybe return some of the children’s pets she has probably stolen. Seriously though, there’s a line of at least 50 cars on the road right now. Why would your first thought  be that it’s an abandoned dog? Anyway, after that incident we kept Duke close by by having the girls play fetch with him. They loved it.

When we finally got to the cabin we started cooking up some hamburgers and Kolton made the best ever fries. He should not have showed me that he knows how to do that. Then we played some games late into the night. Signs and the Mafia card game were the favorites. 

We also needed some kind of dessert and had bought ice cream and all sorts of junk to make some milkshakes. However, the blender was nowhere to be found. So Krystal and I decided to be like Cold Stone and just mix up the ice cream and toppings on the counter. We were much more excited about this than the girls, and their excitement faded even more after we made the first one and it was a huge drippy mess. Then they all said they would just put the toppings on their ice cream in their bowls. So, so much for that. It sounded like a lot more fun than it really was. 

When it was time to go to bed I sorely regretted that hamburger as I was sick alllll night long. I’ll spare the details. (It was so good it was almost worth it though.)

The next morning we took it easy, cleaned up, and headed out. The girls were all wore out and we were too. It was a fun little party and we had a blast!

Quick Random Thoughts

So. I am currently waiting for Kolton to get home from work. And decided to just type and type and get all my random thoughts down while I’m waiting. He said he’d be home 30 minutes ago and has yet to show up. I have learned to start dinner about the time he says he’ll be home because he is always late. Always. Except one time when he was actually on time and couldn’t believe that I didn’t have dinner ready and waiting. I had to remind him that that day had been an anomaly.

Anyway, that’s life at this current point in time. I think Kolton is mostly loving the fact that I am unemployed about as much as I am. I made a checklist the day I got out of school with all the things that I want to accomplish this summer and every day I wake up, go for a walk with my mom, and then pick what I want to do off that list. No responsibility has been the best thing to ever happen to me and I am trying to soak it in as much as possible because I know that life is going to change in a big way in about 3 months which completely terrifies me. I am not a lover of change. In fact, I hate it. The unknown is what scares me and this babe definitely falls in that category. But the days march on and I cross things off my list and the day we get to meet her is getting closer and closer. And while the logical and fundamental part of my brain recognizes that that is a good thing, the larger and irrational part is absolutely terrified. And I know how that sounds coming from someone who just wrote 4 long posts about how badly she wants a baby, but this is honesty. I’m scared out of my mind, but I also think that it just has to be good. It’s just been Kolton and I for so long so this is really going to change things up in hopefully a good way and give life a little more purpose.

Anyway, it really is fun to feel her bumping along inside me all day long. She’s not a big mover but she definitely saves her biggest kicks for when Kolton has his hand on my belly. I’m trying to decide if that means she likes him, or doesn’t like him. However she’s feeling now, I know it’ll only be a matter of time before she is smitten with him. He is the biggest softy of all time, and I’m excited to see them together.

Angela and Brianna threw me the best ever bridal shower before school ended. I left with quite a haul and I was so grateful for everyone who thought of me and was so sweet. That was a fun day. Even better was when I got home and spread everything out on the floor of the spare bedroom/hopefully soon to be baby room. I went in there and just looked at everything often. Since then we have bought a couple outfits and I dug up a baby quilt my Grandma Mickelsen had made. Seeing all this stuff makes it seem a little more real.

I am almost done with my spring cleaning list (SOOO CLOSE!) and once I finish that I will be able to focus on fun things like getting the baby room together and sewing and other little projects. So that’s what I’ve mainly been doing so far this summer and what the aforementioned list mainly consisted of. Anyway, this has been about the most random assortment of thoughts there ever was, but here it is.  

Animals are just not my favorite

We have had quite a few run-ins with different members of the Animal Kingdom lately and they have just not been my favorite. 

The first run-in was with a certain skunk that decided he needed to move in to the space between our house and doghouse. Our dog started barking in the middle of the night for about 2 minutes before he finally quit. Right about that time, since I was already awake I took a little trip to the bathroom, something I do quite frequently these days. It was then that I smelled that distinct skunky odor and knew that we would have a problem in the morning. But I was also sure that our Duke was worth something and had surely chased off the skunk. 

Turns out that Duke is completely worthless because although he had barked for a short time he had done absolutely nothing about the skunk who wandered from the corner by our house, clear across our yard, and finally settled in the space right behind the doghouse where Duke was sleeping. So I was not too happy with him when Kolton went out the door the next morning to check on the situation and found that nasty ole skunk just chillin and smelling up our house. We really didn’t know what to do about the situation because any harm we caused him (including death) would result in him emptying his stink bag right up next to our house. So we debated on what to do for a bit until Kolton got the brilliant idea to give him a taste of his own medicine. He pulled out the pepper spray that my dad had gifted me 10 years ago at Girl’s Camp to protect me from bears and sprayed it in that skunk’s face. Multiple times. While it didn’t make the skunk go anywhere Kolton said he was pretty sure it’s eyes were watering (that kind of made me feel bad) and decided that was all he could do and then just left.

 So I avoided going outside and when Krystal came to visit that afternoon, hours later, she confirmed that he was still holed up. I got nervous that he would make a home of it, but the next morning he was gone! And hasn’t returned. So that’s the end of that, I hope.

The next instance was on a Sunday evening. We had just come home from dinner and a nap at my parents’ and were getting ready to go on a Sundee drive when I saw Duke bark at something under the doghouse. I mentioned that to Kolton and he went to investigate. When I heard him exclaim, “It’s a packrat!” I immediately scooted my booty into the house and observed from behind the screen door. Kolton ran to the garage to grab a shovel and our edger. He was using the shovel as a level to lift the house (it really is a monstrosity) and then sliding the edger underneath it to get the rat to come out. He was having a little difficulty with this plan and said the following to me, “Come out here! Ah! It’s HUGE! Come out and help me!” to which I obviously replied, “There is no way in heck I am coming out there.” Luckily he was able to do it on his own (I knew he could) and then sicked that Duke on the rat. He proved to be much more effective in this situation and we soon had ourselves a big ole giant dead rat. Bleh. Still makes me shudder. 

(On another note, a day later my mom had a packrat at her house. He was a smart sucker and avoided the poison and traps they spread everywhere as he went about clipping flowers for his nest. Really, FLOWERS were what he was after. I thought this was especially sweet and sensitive of him. One morning Brevan saw him climbing on the side of the house (Again, shudder…) and ran in to tell my dad. My dad came running out of the bedroom pulling on his pants and yelling, “Get the gun!” When they discovered him in his nest under the air conditioning unit it took 3 shots to put him down. Yeesh.)

The final instance again involved Duke. I was outside playing fetch with him and examining how my flower beds were coming along when suddenly something big and hard whacked me right smack on top of the head. The whole top of my head felt like it had been bashed in and I immediately was taken back to elementary school days when I would be running around the playground unsuspectingly and get smacked on top of the head by an errant basketball. This happened more than once and was EXACTLY what it felt like that day in my yard. I even looked at the grass around me fully expecting to see a basketball lying there. But nothing. Then I looked for a big stick, still nothing. By then, the shock had worn off and the whole top of my head was really starting to hurt. I started walking quickly away from the scene of the accident and brushed my hand on the top of my head, it came away with a streak of blood on it. So then I kind of flipped out and didn’t know what the heck to do so I got in my car and got outta dodge. The only thing that I could figure at this point was that I had been attacked by a bird. A very large bird, in fact probably the hawk that I see hanging around our house all the time. I grabbed a Kleenex and was trying to stop the bleeding as I called Kolton and drove down the road to my mom’s. I didn’t know why I was going there, I was just kind of freaked at the moment. As soon as Kolton answered the phone I started bawling. My head really did hurt but I think more I was just kind of terrified. I told him that I had been attacked by a bird and as I said the words I started laughing too. So I’m laughing and crying and on the phone and driving and still trying to stop the bleeding. Of course he and my family all thought it was very amusing, because it really is. And still, I do not know what in the heck happened out there. There had been no birds swooping at me or anything! I really think it was a hawk because of the scratch that was left on the top of my head from his talons probably and the fact that it wasn’t just a little bump but a big smack that covered my whole head. Anyway, I have been a little more careful about examining my flowers these days and just watching my step when I walk around my yard in general. 

Happy things!

So it's time to get back to some happy things.

I am currently 23 weeks along with de babe. The babe that we were certain was a boy and is definitely not. We are super lucky to have Shannon do all our ultrasounds because she welcomes us in any time. We were able to go in around 16 ish weeks to look at the gender. On the way in I asked Kolton for his final prediction even though I knew what he would say. Of course he said boy. I wanted to guess girl just to be contrary and put a little money on the deal but I was pretty dang sure it was a boy too. Anyway, when Shannon said, "Girl" we were both thrown for a loop! I had always pictured my first babe to be a girl but I had been so sure it was a boy that I convinced myself to be excited about that so I wouldn't be disappointed. And I definitely wasn't disappointed about it being a girl but it did take a little mind flip to get used to the idea. But I'm pretty dang excited to have a little buddy to do girly things with. Really excited.
We were going to a BBQ with some friends that night and decided to announce our news then. So we ran to Broulims and I grabbed some fruit and very pink fruit dip attempting to be subtle but also assuming that everyone thinks as weirdly as I do. It turns out that they don't because when Andra and Lexi asked about what we had found out I laughed and mentioned the fruit dip. Andra thought the answer was inside the dip and started digging through it with a strawberry until I had to saw that the answer WAS the fruit dip. When we all figured it out it was all very exciting.
That night we took bags full of pink assorted candy to our families. They guessed it within seconds even though they didn't know that we had gone to the doc that day. Brevan was disappointed for half a second but then got over it. (I think...)
The next day I filled bowls of pink candy to put on the desks of my students. They guessed correctly pretty quickly too. And though I had a few moms tell me that my big news was all the talk at their house I'm pretty sure that the kids were way more concerned with the fact that they were given candy.

Which brings me to how we announced the news in the first place. I decided to do a little hangman on the board for the kids to guess. They were able to get it and then it was super awkward. I read the message out loud, "Baby Hansen coming in October!" and then no one said anything. Like, really. There I am standing in front of the class and they all just shrug their shoulders and look at me like, "What now?" It was pretty dang awkward.
The afternoon class gave me a reaction at least that consisted of about 15 kids raising their hands to say, "My mom had a baby." "My aunt's having a baby" "My neighbor had a baby last year" etc. But at least that was something!

We just told our parents after my mom already knew. Then after an ultrasound we sent a picture. My dad handed Brevan his phone to read him his text that had just come in and Brevan figured it out pretty quick. I had told Tylee so Addi was left. My mom sent her over one night to deliver us some bread. I had the ultrasound picture hanging on the fridge so I told her to put the bread in the fridge. No reaction. Then I asked her to get in the fridge to get the jam out. Nothing. Then I had her get the milk out. Still nothing. All the while she is rolling her eyes at Kolton  like I am the most annoying and needy person ever. We are just watching her and cracking up.  When I asked her to put the milk back in the fridge I suggested that she just be really careful with my fridge door. THEN she finally saw it and tears and hugging commenced.

Anyway, I was not feeling so great for the first 20 weeks. My doctor told me around 10 weeks I'd feel better, I figured I would definitely be better by 14 and of course it took til 20. But I have been feeling quite fabulous since then and life has been good. Luckily (I actually think of it as a blessing) I was never too sick at school. I would always throw up before and then after school, but never while there. That was definitely heaven sent. Weirdly enough, I would get the most sick after eating meat. Any kind of meat. So I went on a little vegetarian diet for a few weeks and I'll tell you what. I do not understand people who do that willingly. It was miserable. But having food as my friend again has really just been the best. If you know anything about me you know how much I enjoy food, so you can understand that it was a little rough.

I felt her kick for the first time around 19-20 weeks. I can't remember exactly when the first time was but I felt a definite kick while watching the maturation video with the 5th grade girls and their moms. It must have been all the estrogen in the room that baby girl could connect with. Then on Mother's Day during sacrament meeting she was going crazy. Ever since then I have felt her more and more and Kolton was able to feel her kick for the first time the other night. Pregnancy is pretty fun at this point in time. My belly is about the perfect size and I wish it could just stay this way. Although my belly button is stretched to the max. I worry about that thing because I just don't know how I can stretch any more.

We are feeling so blessed right now and even though I have minor (and major) freakouts often that this is actually happening and that life is changing in a very big way we are mostly excited. And happy that I have the whole summer to prepare. And that's life!

Curse you, Smith Honda!

So.

I have lots of other uplifting things that I could write about but I'm irritated enough at what happened today that I feel the need to share it now. 

So a couple weeks ago someone (ahem...not me) hooked up the jumper cables to my dead car (that was actually my fault) incorrectly and fried some kind of fuse or something. (In his defense, he was trying to help me get off to school and had just woken up and was a little groggy/hurried) From that point on the speakers in my car were no longer working. So dear Kolton took my car to the dealership to get it fixed. He scheduled an appointment for first thing in the morning, the first appointment of the day. He was pretty sure he knew what was wrong with it and which parts they needed to order in. He tried to tell the guy on the phone, but they wouldn't order them before they saw the car.

He got in there on time and sat for nearly two hours. Finally a guy came out and said, "So, we've just pulled your car in. Will you come show us what's wrong with it."    !!!!! I don't know what they were doing for those two hours but they were definitely not working on the car! So that was strike one. And then of course Kolton had been right about what the problem was and they didn't have the right parts so we had to schedule a return appointment. 

I got nominated to take the car in this morning. Now first of all, I'm a big dummy and knew the appointment was at 9:30 but got confused this morning and thought I didn't need to leave till 9:30. So I'm chilling around the house when all the sudden at 8:25 I realize that I needed to be leaving in the next 5 minutes in order to be there on time. So that was brilliant. But I was only about 15 minutes late and felt so bad that I called ahead to warn them. 

I finally get there at 9:45 and they pull my car in and lead me to the waiting room which has a TV and a bunch of magazines. I had asked for a rental car to drive around but they told me they didn't have any available, but DID have a shuttle service to take me somewhere. After Kolton's experience I knew that it probably wasn't going to be a super quick visit (two hours maximum, I figured) and didn't know where they could drop me off for two hours. So I started flipping through the magazines and am immediately disgusted. There are only golf, motorcycle, and Sports Illustrated magazines. Why on earth would they only have magazines geared towards men? Don't they realize that men always volunteer their wives for unpleasant tasks like taking the car in? Maybe I'm totally off base but at least they should have some kind of mix. I did actually find a New Era and settled in to read. 

As I'm reading people are coming in and out and I'm still sitting. On the bright side, there was a neat documentary about eggs on the TV. If you need to know anything about how egg products are produced and the steps involved there I could tell you about anything you need to know. 

Once the egg documentary was over a new one started about how cheese is made. Again, if you want to know about different varieties of cheese and how they are produced, I'm your girl. 

By the time the soybeans documentary had started I'd had just about enough, however. Mind you, this is at 12:30. So I called my mom because I knew she was headed into town. She was about to town and kindly agreed to come pick me up. Then I went to talk to the manager man that I had been working with. Throughout those 2-3 hours not one person had come to update me on the situation or check on me at all. Not that I needed "checked on" necessarily, but I had been sitting there for quite some time. Anyway, the guy told me that some of the sensors they were fixing were what was taking so long. It was about an hour and half job alone let alone with the other things they were fixing. But when I told him I was leaving he assured me that they were nearly done and kind of made me feel dumb for leaving. But I figured I could at least grab some lunch with my ma. 

So we take off and run errands and grab lunch. At 2:30. 2:30!!!! They call me and tell me that my car is done now and I can come grab it. I couldn't believe it and was so glad that I had left that dumb place. We were in the middle of some errands so I told them I'd be back in about an hour. 

We show up at 3:30 and my car is still in the shop. It hasn't been washed (which they had told me they had done), the hood is up, and I can tell someone is still working underneath it. 

When I go inside I ask the guy if they have finished with my car. "Oh yeah," he assured me. Then he happily took me back to pay my bill which about made my eyes pop out of my head. Then he leads me to my car and has me jump in and start it. Then he had me turn it off and sit while he checked the oil levels and talked to the guy that was still definitely changing the oil (which he had assured me on the phone that they had done). Meanwhile I'm sitting in my car doing my best annoyed face to my mom as she's doing it right back to me. 

FINALLY I pull my car out and unload some of the groceries I bought while my mom chews on the guy a little bit. By that point, steam is coming out of my ears but I just wanted to get the heck out of there and NEVER return. Apparently the guy wasn't as phased by her chewing as I usually am because he only offered his apologies. 

Anyway, that was an experience that I don't feel the need to top anytime soon because if you were keeping track that was six hours that I would have been sitting there if my mom hadn't been around. Apparently they had needed an extra part and had to wait for it to come in and then who knows what else they were doing because they definitely hadn't done any of the things they said they would. Man, that was not a fun day. 

Part 4

Through all of that pain and heartache I was able to get through the rest of 2014. Not exactly in one piece, but I was still trudging. 

In December things got hard again. Each month after the miscarriage I would hope and hope and hope to see that positive test. But I was let down again and again. That much hope and let down is not good for a person. I was nearing my breaking point (I thought I had passed it a long time ago, but it just kept getting worse and worse). 

Christmas was hard. I (we) tried to be excited and happy, but it fell flat. We debated on even putting up a tree before we decided to try it, to see if it would lift our spirits. And maybe it did. But really, there wasn't a huge difference. Honestly, I felt like we just made it through the holidays. We put on a happy face and just faked it. A few days after Christmas when I was let down once again, I was nearing nervous breakdown status again. We headed to Island Park for the week and I sobbed (angry sobs) all the way up there, and most of the time that we were there. I wasn't feeling like I was even okay anymore. Now, more than ever, I needed that miracle. And guess what, it finally came. 

Mid-January after a lot of resisting ( I had given up taking pregnancy tests a LONG time ago) Kolton finally convinced me to take a test. And it was positive. I couldn't believe it. When I showed it to Kolton we both just looked at each other, not even daring to hope or really do more than give a small smile to each other. We were not celebrating and we didn't even really dare be happy or excited or make any plans at all. I didn't even try to count months to figure out when I was due for a looong time. We knew the disappointment and heartache that could easily follow this good turn and we weren't going to fall into it again. So we moved forward trying to feel nothing. But as days and weeks passed we started to feel good. Especially once we passed the dreaded 6 week mark (when I had miscarried before). 

My parents had been on a few vacations in January and I hadn't seen much of them. The first time I saw my mom in a few weeks she followed me into the bathroom while I was touching up my makeup and asked if I was pregnant. I denied it for a full 5 minutes before she broke me. She said she could just tell. I was happier. 

A few months later, Kolton was talking to Dave Spencer when he asked if we were expecting. He said that Michelle had noticed something different about me at Parent/ Teacher conference which had been not very long after we had found out. 

Now I am 18 weeks along and happy. It feels so good to be happy again, I had almost forgotten. I've always been a pretty positive and naturally cheerful person and it feels good to find that part of myself again. Because it was gone for a long time. We are doing good. I have been pretty sick which is hard and frustrating, but I finally came to the conclusion that I've been sick because it helps me not to worry. Being sick is a good sign that things are progressing normally and it really is comforting. I feel like I may have felt her a few times, but I don't really know yet. Nothing too regular or definite. 

So far our story has had a happy ending (or beginning, really) but my heart aches for those people who haven't received the blessing that we have. I hurt for them and pray for them always. This was the hardest thing I have ever gone through and for anyone that is currently going through it, I think of you constantly. Just know that you are never alone. 

And that's the end of my story for now. Hopefully I get telling some more upbeat and positive stories now that I've got that off my chest. Life is good! 

Part 3

The strengthening process that I talked about really did take a long time. I still felt broken and shattered, even though I was able to get back into my normal routine. I specifically remember one Sunday. My cousin played an arrangement to "Master the Tempest is Raging" in Sacrament Meeting. As she played I was overcome with emotion. I opened up the hymnbook and followed along with the words and felt that the first two verses in particular really described how I felt at that point in time. 

1. Master, the tempest is raging!
   The billows are tossing high!
   The sky is o’ershadowed with blackness,
   No shelter or help is nigh;
   Carest Thou not that we perish?
   How canst Thou lie asleep,
   When each moment so madly is threat’ning
   A grave in the angry deep?
   • 
     
2. Master, with anguish of spirit
   I bow in my grief today;
   The depths of my sad heart are troubled—
   Oh, waken and save, I pray!
   Torrents of sin and of anguish
   Sweep o’er my sinking soul;
   And I perish! I perish! dear Master—
   Oh, hasten, and take control.
3. Thinking about this song and how much the words really applied to my life at that point in time had me in tears the rest of the day. I taught the YW lesson and bawled through the whole thing. I think the girls were a little weirded out. They didn't know what was going on with me and truthfully no one did. A miscarriage isn't exactly something you broadcast to people. It's something that is kept quiet. I didn't tell my very closest friends for a really long time. So we were just privately mourning throughout the entire fall. Those were really bitter and bleak days. Even though I had been strengthened, it was still painful. And it hurt all the time. There was a ragged hole in my chest that didn't heal. And if I didn't know any better, I would think that there was literally a hole there because I felt it. It had ragged edges and was just there and wouldn't heal. Every time I cried during those months I could feel it and I would huddle up and clench my shoulders together to try to stop it from getting bigger. 
4. One thing that helped me get through that fall was the poem "Good Timber" by Douglas Malloch. I would constantly (multiple times a day) repeat the following lines to myself.
5. The tree that never had to fight
For sun and sky and air and light,
But stood out in the open plain
And always got its share of rain,
Never became a forest king
But lived and died a scrubby thing.






Good timber does not grow with ease:
The stronger wind, the stronger trees;
The further sky, the greater length;
The more the storm, the more the strength.
By sun and cold, by rain and snow,
In trees and men good timbers grow.

Part 2

Seeing that positive pregnancy test was a miracle. I remember it perfectly. It was September 19th and the best day ever. But even though seeing that little positive symbol made me over the moon happy, I wasn't completely over the moon happy. I had this teeny, tiny foreboding feeling that I quickly pushed away. I felt it was really a miracle that I was experiencing. The first month I quit seeing the doctors, I got pregnant. My due date would coincide exactly with the end of the school year. It was all perfect. 

 It was a happy two weeks. I was feeling better than I had in a LONG time. It was Spud Harvest and I was freezing carrots from my garden. I had been feeling uncomfortably, painfully crampy all day and when Kolton came home for a late lunch I went to the bathroom and saw a tiny bit of blood. I fell apart and we jumped in the car and sped to the doctor. It was a silent, scary ride. We got right in and as soon as they started the ultrasound Shannon said, "Oh! There's a heartbeat!" Immediately we felt super relieved and were able to leave the office with smiles. 

Over the next few days I kept bleeding. And it progressively got worse and worse. One night I woke up at 2 am in a cold sweat and sobbed to Kolton about what would happen if we did lose the baby. I was eventually able to calm myself and go back to sleep. 

I went to the doctor again a few days later because I was still bleeding. Again, there was a heartbeat and I felt hopeful. But at this appointment the doctor insisted on drawing blood to figure out my blood type. I thought this was odd but went with it. When I got home that night I was in serious pain for the next few hours until I finally miscarried. But even then we weren't sure. I was exhausted and quickly fell asleep but Kolton was awake and worried. The next morning we went to the doctor first thing to confirm what we really already knew, but hadn't really accepted. 

From that point on, I felt anguish. Just pure despair. I sobbed and sobbed and sobbed through the next two days. I couldn't get off the couch. I couldn't eat or sleep and when I tried to get up to do something to take my mind off of it I couldn't even stand up straight. So I just laid on the couch, miserable. Nothing anyone could do or say made me feel better. Kolton was upset too, but I was just in a whole other league of misery. I don't even like to think back to that time because it just makes me cry and wonder how I did it. And I didn't know how I was going to do it. I honestly wanted to die. I wished for it because I had no idea how I was going to make it through this. 

On one of those first nights Kolton was outside dealing with his grief in a productive way (doing yard work) and I was in the house still unable to do anything. I remember laying on the bathroom floor and trying to pray. It came out as more of an angry yell, "Why did you do this to me? What have I done to deserve this? How am I going to move on? How will I ever be okay again?" I poured my soul out to Heavenly Father and let Him just how unhappy I was with Him. I blamed him for taking away my baby. And I just didn't know why. 

As I was lying there, I was slowly able to calm down and stop the tears that hadn't quit flowing for two days. I felt a teeny, tiny bit of peace and I was able to pick myself up off the floor and take a tiny step forward. From that point on, each day got a little better. It was imperceptible at first, but looking back on those days, and weeks, and months I can see how it got better. I was able to go back to school and go to a friend's baby shower which I knew would be painful and had thought would be impossible. 

I know, without a doubt, that I had the help of my Heavenly Father to pass through this trial. This experience reminds me so much of the story in Mosiah 24. The people of Alma are being persecuted by the Lamanites and cry unto the Lord. Here's a small part of that chapter:

 13 And it came to pass that the voice of the Lord came to them in their afflictions, saying: Lift up your heads and be of good comfort, for I know of the covenant which ye have made unto me; and I will covenant with my people and deliver them out of bondage.

 14 And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions.

 15 And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord.

I can relate so much to this story. I can testify that I felt that strengthening process. I had this huge burden placed on me and it was more than I could bear. But as I continued to pray to Heavenly Father he strengthened me. He didn't take my burden away like I wanted Him to, but He strengthened me that I was able to bear it. This didn't happen overnight. It took a long time, but eventually I was able to be okay again. Not great, not even fine, but okay. 

Here I am.

Here I am, ready to write the longest and hopefully not too super depressing post. But I've been feeling like I needed to share my story for quite a while now. And that's why the posting has basically stopped. I can't write anything until I've written out what I need to. 

So, in light of our big, happy, life-changing news...

I feel like I have to share a little more about how we got here. Because it was not an easy journey. And while I wouldn't wish it on anyone, I want to share so if anyone else is going through the same thing, they can maybe find some peace through reading my story. 

So we started talking about baby stuff in November of 2012. I went off birth control and we weren't necessarily "trying" but we definitely were not not trying. I figured it would happen within a couple months but those passed with nothing. Finally I started using ovulation predictor kits and never got a positive result. My biggest regret is waiting a year to see a doctor, but I felt like that's what was required. My second biggest regret is going to see the doctor that we chose. I wrote about that here

But after my surgery I was feeling much more peaceful. I felt like we had found the cause of the problem and miracle! I ovulated on my own (without any meds) for the first time ever! I was feeling good until the specialist we were seeing put me back on medication (Femara). I didn't feel right about this but figured he was a specialist and surely knew more about this than I did. Anyway, that stuff did a number on me. I can't remember how many rounds exactly that I did but it turned me into a psycho crazy person. I was moody and weepy and honestly just a real mess. 

One night in early August I had what I don't know what to call other than a nervous breakdown. I had been running to Rexburg about every other day for a couple days to do ultrasounds to track when I ovulated. Finally Shannon told me that I hadn't ovlulated that month and probably wouldn't. I felt like we were back to square one and had made NO progress, actually we had taken steps backward in the past few months. I was an emotional wreck all day long. I remember making about 15 loaves of zucchini bread trying to calm myself. It didn't work. And when I got in a baler that night and my mom called, it all came crashing down. I can't even explain it. I was sobbing and couldn't breathe (hyperventilating) and just a complete mess. My mom finally came and pulled me out of the baler and took me home to Kolton who, sweet soul that he is, had no idea what to do with me. 

That night and over the next few days we decided that we were DONE. No more doctor's visits, no more blood draws, and definitely no more medications. We were taking a complete break from everything until January. For the first time in a long time, I felt completely peaceful. Everything was good. I knew that it was right. And guess what else? I got pregnant. 

1-6

It's teacher work day.
That means the kids are home enjoying their three day weekend and I am here at school doing anything I can to avoid working.
I am struggling today. I have lots to do but just no ambition to get it done. So I'm here to give you the most random assortment of thoughts that has ever been about my life in this current point in time.

1. So Kolton is the breakfast maker in our household. In the mornings I'm always too busy dragging myself out of bed and taming my hair into submission to do more than grab a granola bar on the way out the door. So Kolton staged an intervention and I don't know if he knew what he was signing up for when he started, but now he's the official breakfast man. 

And let me tell you, he makes a mean smoothie. I feel like he is really selling himself short. He should be working at Jamba.

2. Speaking of Jamba, one day I was grocery shopping (maybe?) and Kolton was not wanting to be grocery shopping so to get himself out of it he suggested that while I shop he would grab us some Jambas. I was on to him but a Jamba can always win me over. So he went to Jamba and was having a hard time deciding what to order. (I know, totally out of character for him.) the kid working the counter asked if he could make a suggestion and told him he should order a Meeko's Miracle and then explained that it was one of his inventions that had been self-titled. So Kolton did it and guess what? It was the best ever!!
A couple months later the grocery shopping situation repeated itself and Kolton went to Jamba and ordered up a Meeko's Miracle. And everybody in Jamba was so excited about it. They were all peeking at Kolton from the back and telling each other what he'd ordered.

3. We started over on the Office. That Netflix was the best gift I could have ever given Kolton. Anyway, we finished The Office a few months ago and I have been begging Kolton to start watching it again and one day he gave in and now our evenings are super enjoyable. I love that show too much.

4. I do Scholastic Book Orders at school and I just love them. I am always encouraging the kids to order because I can get free books. There's probably an illegal term for what I am doing there, but I don't know what it is. But seriously. Over the course of this year I have currently got 31 free books. And they are good ones!

5. Speaking of school, it is going swell. This is always a hard time of year because we start feeling a little burned out but Spring Break is coming!! But the last couple months have really been fun. I feel like I was a big grouch for the first half of the school year because I was trying to train those kids and get them to behave. But we finally got it done and I feel like we understand each other better now. And probably I am still a big grouch but it really is a lot better and I have learned that being a grouch is worth it! The kids know when I mean business and they are respectful and we all just get along a lot better. We are starting our huge culminating research project and I am trying to take big, deep breaths because honestly this project is more work for me than for them. I need to find my chi or zen or whatever that word is so this project can be a good experience for everyone.
Also, I brought in some new beanbags for the reading corner and you would not believe the reactions I've gotten from the kids over a few beanbags. I have answered so many questions about them "Are they made out of pants?" (They look like jean material) "Why is your name on them?" (My grandma gave them to me for Christmas 10 years ago and I haven't sat in them since) "They have pockets!!" (Not a question, but they have decided that the pockets are probably for snacks.) Man, I really like these kids.

6. Kolton has been begging me to go with him on the roadbike. He says that since it's 50 degrees we should be good to go. I keep telling him to talk to me when it's closer to 70. Anyway, he took it yesterday to run some errands in town and had to admit that I was maybe right about the coldness factor. He said he was pretty frozen.

And that's my life lately! It feels good to get some of that out there.  

I should be embarrassed...

But since I have no shame, I am not. 

Over the last month I have attended two different dances that were definitely not held for my enjoyment. 

We had a 5th grade dance at school for an end of the trimester party. Mrs. Johansen taught the kids some ballroom and we had a little dance to show off their moves. It was hilarious and so, so fun.

I had the kids make some decorations and they dressed up all fancy like for the big day. This was the first dance the kids had been to so they were a little terrified once it started. The music was playing and the girls were sitting on one side of the gym with the boys on the opposite side all just staring at each other. 

That's when my annoying, bossy side came out. I started dragging kids out on the floor and telling them that if they didn't pick a partner in 10 seconds I was going to pick one for them. This scared most of them enough to go grab a girl. However, there were a few kids that I had to push to the girls side for every single song the entire dance. 

Along with the ballroom dancing we also did some fun songs like the Cotton Eye Joe and Cha Cha Slide which I just think are the most fun ever. 

Needless to say, by the end of the day I was a sweaty mess. I was trying to channel my inner Judy Polatis and also my inner Lewis Newman to make the dance fun. I was whooping and hollering and cheering and just really being embarrassing. If Kolton had been there I know he would have been hiding in a corner embarrassed to claim me. But I had fun and the kids had fun, so that's all that mattered. 

The next dance I attended was the Spring Youth Dance for the Beehives and Deacons. Again, I tried to channel my more fun side and also my bossy side got a lot of use. I was dragging kids out of the floor and dancing like a maniac and just really having a great time. The first dance I danced with Brevan who at the end of the dance as everyone was leaving the dance floor decided to try to dip me but had underestimated how heavy I am and promptly dropped me on my back in front of everyone. (I was a tiny bit embarrassed then.) 

Anyway, it was a good time and it made me remember how much I just love to dance. I miss going to high school or college dances with friends and just busting a move and not caring who saw. Now I have to live vicariously through other kids and try to make them have as much fun as I always did.