Animals are just not my favorite

We have had quite a few run-ins with different members of the Animal Kingdom lately and they have just not been my favorite. 

The first run-in was with a certain skunk that decided he needed to move in to the space between our house and doghouse. Our dog started barking in the middle of the night for about 2 minutes before he finally quit. Right about that time, since I was already awake I took a little trip to the bathroom, something I do quite frequently these days. It was then that I smelled that distinct skunky odor and knew that we would have a problem in the morning. But I was also sure that our Duke was worth something and had surely chased off the skunk. 

Turns out that Duke is completely worthless because although he had barked for a short time he had done absolutely nothing about the skunk who wandered from the corner by our house, clear across our yard, and finally settled in the space right behind the doghouse where Duke was sleeping. So I was not too happy with him when Kolton went out the door the next morning to check on the situation and found that nasty ole skunk just chillin and smelling up our house. We really didn’t know what to do about the situation because any harm we caused him (including death) would result in him emptying his stink bag right up next to our house. So we debated on what to do for a bit until Kolton got the brilliant idea to give him a taste of his own medicine. He pulled out the pepper spray that my dad had gifted me 10 years ago at Girl’s Camp to protect me from bears and sprayed it in that skunk’s face. Multiple times. While it didn’t make the skunk go anywhere Kolton said he was pretty sure it’s eyes were watering (that kind of made me feel bad) and decided that was all he could do and then just left.

 So I avoided going outside and when Krystal came to visit that afternoon, hours later, she confirmed that he was still holed up. I got nervous that he would make a home of it, but the next morning he was gone! And hasn’t returned. So that’s the end of that, I hope.

The next instance was on a Sunday evening. We had just come home from dinner and a nap at my parents’ and were getting ready to go on a Sundee drive when I saw Duke bark at something under the doghouse. I mentioned that to Kolton and he went to investigate. When I heard him exclaim, “It’s a packrat!” I immediately scooted my booty into the house and observed from behind the screen door. Kolton ran to the garage to grab a shovel and our edger. He was using the shovel as a level to lift the house (it really is a monstrosity) and then sliding the edger underneath it to get the rat to come out. He was having a little difficulty with this plan and said the following to me, “Come out here! Ah! It’s HUGE! Come out and help me!” to which I obviously replied, “There is no way in heck I am coming out there.” Luckily he was able to do it on his own (I knew he could) and then sicked that Duke on the rat. He proved to be much more effective in this situation and we soon had ourselves a big ole giant dead rat. Bleh. Still makes me shudder. 

(On another note, a day later my mom had a packrat at her house. He was a smart sucker and avoided the poison and traps they spread everywhere as he went about clipping flowers for his nest. Really, FLOWERS were what he was after. I thought this was especially sweet and sensitive of him. One morning Brevan saw him climbing on the side of the house (Again, shudder…) and ran in to tell my dad. My dad came running out of the bedroom pulling on his pants and yelling, “Get the gun!” When they discovered him in his nest under the air conditioning unit it took 3 shots to put him down. Yeesh.)

The final instance again involved Duke. I was outside playing fetch with him and examining how my flower beds were coming along when suddenly something big and hard whacked me right smack on top of the head. The whole top of my head felt like it had been bashed in and I immediately was taken back to elementary school days when I would be running around the playground unsuspectingly and get smacked on top of the head by an errant basketball. This happened more than once and was EXACTLY what it felt like that day in my yard. I even looked at the grass around me fully expecting to see a basketball lying there. But nothing. Then I looked for a big stick, still nothing. By then, the shock had worn off and the whole top of my head was really starting to hurt. I started walking quickly away from the scene of the accident and brushed my hand on the top of my head, it came away with a streak of blood on it. So then I kind of flipped out and didn’t know what the heck to do so I got in my car and got outta dodge. The only thing that I could figure at this point was that I had been attacked by a bird. A very large bird, in fact probably the hawk that I see hanging around our house all the time. I grabbed a Kleenex and was trying to stop the bleeding as I called Kolton and drove down the road to my mom’s. I didn’t know why I was going there, I was just kind of freaked at the moment. As soon as Kolton answered the phone I started bawling. My head really did hurt but I think more I was just kind of terrified. I told him that I had been attacked by a bird and as I said the words I started laughing too. So I’m laughing and crying and on the phone and driving and still trying to stop the bleeding. Of course he and my family all thought it was very amusing, because it really is. And still, I do not know what in the heck happened out there. There had been no birds swooping at me or anything! I really think it was a hawk because of the scratch that was left on the top of my head from his talons probably and the fact that it wasn’t just a little bump but a big smack that covered my whole head. Anyway, I have been a little more careful about examining my flowers these days and just watching my step when I walk around my yard in general.